10 Tips To Communicate Better With Your Boyfriend
At a complete loss for knowing just what is going on inside your man’s head? Don’t even know how to breach the sticky subjects?
Well, most of us women are in that same boat. But there are ways of making him talk. It just takes a little planning and maybe even more self-control. These relationship tips should help you get on your way to communicating better with your boyfriend.
#1. Don’t sweat the small stuff
Ladies, learn to let the little things go. If it’s during work hours and he doesn’t respond to your text message immediately, think logically, realize he’s most likely busy and not ignoring you. And even if he saw your message and couldn’t reply, be understanding. Think of times when you’ve been busy.
#2. Tell him you just want him to listen
Let your boyfriend know that you just want to vent – that you aren’t looking for an answer or for him to save you. Sometimes you just want his shoulder to cry on, but instead, when men hear a problem they start thinking that they have to figure out a way to fix it. And then they completely lose track of what you were saying.
#3. Get to the point
When you have something important to say, try to explain it as simply and efficiently as possible. Men have very short attention spans and although they are trying to listen, you might be losing them in your 15 minute explanation of what’s bothering you. Just say it right away.
#4. Stop bringing the past into the present
Learn to forgive. If you are arguing about something today, don’t bring an issue from six months ago into the mix. That should have been addressed then, not now. How can you move forward in the relationship if you’re already starting from behind?
If something is bothering you, take a few deep breaths before expressing it. No one, woman or man, will make any progress towards a solution if the situation is a heated argument before it even starts.
#6. Resist the urge to scream at him
The same could be said for crying. If there is a serious issue, of course its natural to have such emotions, but screaming your feelings will only anger him and crying will only upset him. Both of which will keep you two from getting to the real issue in the relationship. More time will be spent reacting to each of your emotions than addressing the issue at hand.
#7. Always be respectful
Don’t let your emotions get the best of you during an argument. Make sure that your boyfriend knows that you respect him even if you’re fighting. Don’t belittle him, instead bring up your issue on common ground, otherwise, attacking his ego will get you no where. This goes for any argument and any relationship, platonic or romantic.
#8. Write your thoughts
If something is seriously bothering you, write it down. Let out all those emotions wrapped up in that issue on paper. Then, when the time comes to talk to your boyfriend, you can be much calmer and have a much better chance of getting through to him.
#9. Mean what you say
Men are far from mind readers. If you complaining about him just sitting and watching TV when he gets home, but it really bothers you because you feel like you aren’t spending enough quality time together, tell him the truth! Tell him that you wish you would spend more quality time together, instead of complaining about his TV watching habits and avoiding the real issue.
#10. Butter him up
Don’t forget to tell your man that you appreciate him. Let him know how much you love and care for him. The more that anyone feels appreciated in a relationship, the more willing they are to work together to solve problems.