Tuesday, June 18, 2024

Marrying A Pastor: Things You Must Know

Things You Must Know Before Marrying A Pastor

There is one thing about marriage that makes it a mystery and special in its own right. Not the greatest counselor can give you a 70 percent accurate prediction on what to expect as you marry. Marrying a  pastor comes with its own pros and cons.

This is because the dynamics changes according to the individuals involved. Sometimes people wished they had prior information and knowledge before going into their marriages. It is bad; they had to acquire that experience on their own.


This is the kind of situation pastors’ wives usually find themselves in. They wish they knew a lot of things before saying, “I do.” According to correspondences, I bring to you some things pastors’ wives wished they knew before getting married.


1. Pastors Have Their Flaws

Many people demand pastors to be of high standards and act like saints despite being human. What they forget is that pastors also have blood flowing through their veins. Some pastors’ wives also go into their marriages with such misconceptions. They end up being disappointed when their husbands begin to show their human side.


2. The Need for Being Themselves

If some pastors’ wives pick up a completely new personality to please, there would be husbands and congregants. If they change from being themselves into something they can’t even conform to. As time goes on and the reality begins to draw on them, they try getting back to their real self, which can be too late.


3. They Know How to Deal With Criticizing

Pastors are not free from criticisms because Jesus Christ, the head of Christianity, was criticized during his ministry. How to handle it is the most important thing.

If pastors can deal with criticisms due to their training, their wives are mostly unable to do that. But they end up becoming bitter towards the critics, and that affects their relationship with them.

4. Wish They Knew Their Marriage is Open to Public Scrutiny

Since pastors are public figures, and many people look up to them as mentors. So whatever they do, including their marriage, is, therefore, open to public scrutiny.

Hence, people have high expectations of them and judge them according to those expectations. But this makes marrying a pastor very challenging, as you are expected to act like saints. Then there is all sort of personalities in the church. So the selfish, backstabbers, gossip, jealousy, and mean, to mention a few.

5. The Fact That Some Congregants Can be “Nasty.”

These people can make life in the church very unbearable, and dealing with them can be tough. So all they can do is ignore such people. When they wish, they knew in advance that such people exist in the church.


6. The Fact That They Have to Contribute to Their Husband’s Profession

So Pastors’ wives have a role to play in the church and the development of their husband’s career. But, their actions and inactions can determine the success or failure of their husbands.

Therefore, wives are required to support their husbands in preparing for church, motivating them when they are down, and the many other duties.

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