Jewel/Emerald Green for Obsession
Meditation For The Lovers – Reversed
The Lovers card has a dark side, a mirror that shows what happens when love and passion becomes obsession. This tarot meditation will take us down that path, there will be no Victorian garden on this trip. Settle your card in front of you, inverted on the cloth with the candle at the top of the cloth.
Surround it with those things that you see as your vices, or that represent vice to you. Whether it be a lovers cologne, a collection of coins, your work badge, or your favorite CURRENT chemical vice (please don’t bring past bad influences into this meditation.)
As you settle into it, feel the cloying presence, that distinct discomfort you experience when you are around the truly obsessed.
There is a weight to the air, a sickness, and for this meditation that is where we are going to go. Let the tarot meaning of the card pull you in.
You find yourself at the edge of a heavy thicket, and at its edge is a pair of heavy cellar doors in the foundation of a long collapsed and ruined house. Swing open the doors and see the cloying darkness within, barely lit by flickering firelight.
Beneath you find a damp hallway made of old crumbling brick work, it twists and turns around on itself to the point you lose track of where the exit is. Roots and worms slither between the bricks, slipping their way through long-rotted mortar. Everything here reeks of sickness.
You come to an alcove, and within you find a sunken, sallow-eyed man curled over in front of his computer, one hand seeking to pleasure himself, the screen covered in the most lurid and dark of sexual images.
He is consumed and surrounded by tissues and filth, there is no joy here, no real lust, just an unending pit of need. He is lost to real love and connection, there is only the need.
You travel on, and the thick chemical smell fills the air. The next alcove has a group of people, all passing about a glass pipe. Their eyes are sunken, their flesh thin, their bones and ribs visible.
They smoke, they pass, and even the food around them stays uneaten. A crib sits in the corner, strangely silent, before you see more you walk on.
The next room contains two couples, a woman holding her arms close to herself, her eyes fearful as she whispers into the phone. “It’s ok, it’s ok, and it’s my fault. I know what he’s like when he gets mad, I know he loves me.”
The man standing next to her looks contemptuous and violent, glaring pompously down at his subdued play-thing, not lover, just a thing he keeps around.
For those who know how to look, the fear in his eyes almost mirrors hers, but as a form of obsession and control, what is she if she is lost? He cannot see what he does to her, all he cares is that she listens and is kept.
You will come around one last corner, and standing in that alcove is something that pulls you, something that terrifies you. Your obsession, your vice, your weakness that lies within.
As it starts to pull you in, you spot streams of fresh, healthy light at the tunnels end, and tear yourself away, running for the light of fresh air, for freedom. As you rip open the gate and leave, you hear the words “You’ll be back… They always come back.” Echo behind you.
Come out of the tarot meditation of the Lovers card reversed, know that this need not be. You can be free of your old vices, it just takes awareness and learning the necessary steps.
This is love and passion perverted. Take yourself out, take a few deep breaths, and then write in your journal what you experienced, what lessons you took with you. Then go take care of yourself, this trip wasn’t a pleasant one.